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  #1  
Unread 01-22-2010, 05:00 PM
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Lightbulb Masamunesephiroth's Epic College Stories

i have had some memorable times within just a week at college, so i decided to start making stories based off of them.


1.) The Tale of Hobo Kitty

Me and several of my friends (and soon to be new friends) where all at a party that was in a abandoned building, but this was no ordinary building.....it was called The Baron. It is a building that is sound proof and cleaned up on the inside, complete with heaters, beer pong table, multiple couches, 2 bathrooms, and 2 floors. ANYWAY!......later on during the party, i was in the middle of a beer pong game and i was about to make my shot while intoxicated, wearing an Avatar movie t-shirt and doing karate stances XD. As i was about to my shot, she jumped on the table.....Hobo Kitty. Of course, i was confused as to why a kitty was at the party, so i asked her why she was on the pong table. I asked my beer pong partner (whom i do not remember the name to) who brought the kitty? she said, "thats hobo kitty, shes always here.". then i said "hobo kitty?", then she said "yeah hobo kitty, now take the damn shot." I took my shot with my eyes closed and made it into the #8 (or 7...i forget) cup and made the touchdown hand gesture, and as i was doing so, i looked at my beer, and hobo kitty was smacking at my beer can. i knew hobo kitty was to young to drink, so i carried her on my shoulder as i finished the game off with my partner (whom i dont remember the name to). after that was done, i took a break and sat next to my friends Bob and Jeff with Hobo kitty with me. I turned to Bob and told him she was my drinking partner and said "watch this". every time i tried to lift the beer to my mouth, hobo kitty would smack at it. That was a sign that i have had too much XD. They agreed with me that hobo kitty was awesome, then we took a drink. Sadly, later on during the party, something startled hobo kitty, so she jumped off my shoulder and ran away. I never saw her again that night .

That is the tale of hobo kitty.

2.) The Dorm Key

(based off actual events)
I was on the laptop talking with someone, but i knew i had early classes and it was around 2am, so i wanted to get off take my shower and go to bed. i was kinda in a hurry so i could get bed quicker, and just grabbed a bunch of stuff an left for the showers. What i didn't know was that i left my dorm keys in the room and the door automatically locks itself. On top of that, my room mate says hes a heavy sleeper and cant be woken up that easily....he wasn't kidding.
Skipping the shower scene, i noticed my shorts i was gonna wear to bed had fallen on the ground and got soaked in water. i ringed as much water as i could out of them and put them on anyway. i picked up all my bathroom stuff and walked to dorm room. this is where i have fun.
I just knock lightly seeings how Bowser (roommates nickname) was just getting to bed when i went to the shower......no answer. i knock louder....no answer. i wanted to change my wet pants and get to bed, so i kicked the door, jiggling the handle and telling Bowser to get up......no answer. At first i started to think he wasn't even in the room, so i put my ear to the door and heard him snoring slightly. It was 2am and everyone was asleep, so if i kept banging on the door, some people would come out of their dorm rooms and yell at me, so i just sat next to the door for about 5 mins., and banging on the door every now and then.

30mins. pass by......

i had a feeling that i wasn't going to get to bed that night, so i used my dirty close as a pillow and the towel as a blanket and tried to sleep, cuddled up against the wall.

i think 25mins. pass by and i almost fell asleep once or twice.....

I wasn't going to get to sleep that well because there was a breeze blowing threw the the 3rd level of the Dieterich Halls and my clothes where still wet, so i picked up my stuff and went down to the 1st floor where the lounge was because its slightly warmer in there. ....elevator didn't work at that time, so i used the stairs. if i took my shower just a little earlier, the front desk would have been open and i could have gotten a spare key to open the door, but the desk closes at 2am. There was a snack/drink machine in the lounge and i was kinda hungry because i didn't eat a big supper, so i wanted to eat a pop-tart with some orange juice.......FORGOT MY WALLET IN THE DORM ROOM! so i just sat down and looked around the lounge. I wanted to go to bed badly, so i went back upstairs to try waking Bowser up again.....didnt work, so i went back down to the lounge and put 2 comfy chairs together and fell asleep.

wake up at 6:32 am........

I woke up because the janitor was cleaning up. I apologized and said i got locked out of my room. then i thought, "the janitor has keys to all the rooms.....EUREKA!" i asked her if she could unlock my door.....she said sure......i was so happy T__T. so we went to the ELEVATOR THAT WAS WORKING THE WHOLE TIME and went up to my room and she unlocked it. i said "thank you so much" and closed the door. I didnt even bother changing my wet clothes because they became dry from walking around for so long. i had less then 2 hours of sleep before i had to go to my classes......i was like.....F**k it and went to bed, turning off my alarm.

Thats why i didn't go to Art and Math class today.

i dont think we have anything important to do in Art class and the Math class professor is retarded, so i didnt care if i missed those classes. i wonder if they will take this story as an excuse XDD.

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Unread 01-23-2010, 08:05 AM
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Default Re: Masamunesephiroth's Epic College Stories

I WANT HOBO KITTY!

Can't wait to see more epic college stories!
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Unread 01-23-2010, 05:33 PM
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Default Re: Masamunesephiroth's Epic College Stories

ill be sure to write down what i remember
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Unread 01-23-2010, 05:35 PM
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Default Re: Masamunesephiroth's Epic College Stories

LOL you and your friends are so random, but the stories are funny
Hobo kitty that played with beer cans xD
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Unread 01-23-2010, 06:43 PM
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Default Re: Masamunesephiroth's Epic College Stories

Missouri is boring, so its essential that we know how to party xD

Red vs Blue Party

(i advise you watch the first season of RedvsBlue before reading this.)
The night started out with me buying a pizza with bread sticks because i knew i was gonna go to a party with my friend JJ and the others. i was running out of time on my phone, so i just didn't answer it and took the elevator down to the 1st floor, walking out the front door. What he didn't tell me was that his girlfriend was driving her car instead of his car, with is a bigger car then hers.......guess what type of car parked next to her car? It was a car that looked similar to his.... i walk down the side walk seeing the big car and immediately assume that it was JJ. i like to joke around, so i thought about shaking the car, it was a good thing i didnt because as i was about to open the door, i heard "over here matt", so i stopped and turned around..seeing JJ. i was like, if your there....who's in here? O___O; i bet i creeped the people in that car out XDD. To avoid any awkward moments, i threw the pizza in the car and dove in. "why the hell didnt you tell me that your girlfriend was driving?" we all laughed and went to Kyles house to party.
When we got there jj got Chinese food and he was dumb because he made the Chinese food guy wait for him. So we go upstairs and greet everyone as kyle runs out of his room screaming because hes random and he was intoxicated at the time. i sat down and ate some of the pizza while JJ ate Chinese food and more people got to the party. We had trouble deciding on what drinking game to play, so we decided to go with "Ring of Fire" instead of beer pong.
How to Play Ring of Fire:
Click here to see full text
Ring of Fire Official Rules:
  • First to set up the game, clear off a table and set a cup in the middle with the deck of cards placed around the cup in a circle.
  • Now get a group of friends to gather around the table, each person having a cup/bottle of alcohol to themselves.
  • Before you start the game you must know what each card stands for:

    A- Waterfall – Everyone must keep drinking until the person who picked the card stops. So who knows how long you will be going for!
    2- is Choose – You can choose someone to drink
    3- is Me – You must drink
    4- is Whore – All girls drink
    5- Thumb Master- When you put your thumb on the table everyone must follow and whomever is last must drink. you are the thumb master till someone else picks a five.
    6- is Dicks – All guys drink
    7- is Heaven – Point your finger in the sky, whoever is last must drink
    8- is Mate – Choose someone to drink with you
    9- Rhyme – Pick a word such a dog and the person next to you must rhyme with dog, like log, and it goes to the next person and the next, in a circle, until someone messes up and he or she will have to drink
    10- Categories- Pick a category such a football and you go in a circle and everyone has to say a word that fits with football such as: touchdown, field goal, USC. Whoever messes up, drinks.
    Jack- Make a Rule – You can make up any rule that everyone has to follow, such as you can only drink with your right hand. Everyone (including you) must follow this rule for the whole entire game and if you disobey you must drink.
    Queen- Questions – Go around in a circle and you have to keep asking questions to each other. Doesn’t matter what the question is, as long as its a question. Whoever messes up and does not say a question, drinks.
    King- Pour!- You must pour a little of your drink into the cup that is in the middle of the table. Whomever picks up the LAST king must drink the whole cup, which could be filled with different drinks, so who knows how bad it could taste!
  • Now that you know the rules. One person starts off by picking up a card, and whatever the card may be, follow the rule. Go in a circle and keep picking a card till the last King is picked!
  • We change the the rules up a bit, like if we draw a 4, the person gets to draw a dinosaur any where on anyone. As we played on, a girl got a 4 and she picked me as the person to get the dragon drawn. awesome dragon evar lol it was on my hand where the teeth where on the finger and thumb xD. anyway, we played on and my friend JJ got a four and drew a poor version of Yoshi on Ron's arm and its saying "im yoshi bitch." I got a 10, so i had to pick a Category, so i said "7 Wonders of the world". Ron was the one that drank lol. someone else got the thumb card and i had to drink because i wasn't paying attention and i didn't put my thumb on the table Xb. (i had a cup of Jim Bean with less then 1/3 of the cup filled with Coca Cola lol) Everyone changed their mind and decided that we where going to play the RedvsBlue beer pong where we had to be characters from the show....i was Tucker from the Red Team and JJ was Grif . We played on and i tied my sweater up to where it looked like a turban. while we where in the middle of playing, we where listening to Fair to Midland, Heavy Metal, The Mars Volta, Tool, Disturbed, "Brains, brains, brains" from the Billy and Mandy zombie episode, power ranger theme, DBZ theme, and some other bands i forget lol. (Goliath by Mars Volta FTW.) The game was taking forever because we where both on the last cup, so JJ left and sat with his GF.....he was wasted lol. Kyle came over on my side, threw the ball and won the game with his first throw lol. OH! another guy that was a friend to JJ came over that knew how to play a Ukulele and he played "Im Yours" and 2 drinking songs that where cool and we sang to them. Ron said "we are gonna watch Season 1 of Red vs. Blue now!" so we plugged his USB drive into the Xbox360 and we watched it on the TV as people started to leave on by one because it was almost 3am. Then i left with JJ and his GF back to my dorm. i was going to pick up the nintendo Wii and Star Ocean for the 360, but JJ said he will get it to me on Sunday. I ate some Chips Ahoy cookies, then went to bed.

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Unread 01-23-2010, 08:47 PM
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Default Re: Masamunesephiroth's Epic College Stories

Hobo Kitty FTW!!!!!!
Nice stories Matt!Great stuff!
The dorm key was pretty good as well but Hobo Kitty wins hands down.
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Unread 01-23-2010, 08:49 PM
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Default Re: Masamunesephiroth's Epic College Stories

lol i miss hobo kitty XDD......
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Unread 01-23-2010, 09:28 PM
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Default Re: Masamunesephiroth's Epic College Stories

Lovely stories Matt. really enjoyed them.
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Unread 01-23-2010, 09:30 PM
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Default Re: Masamunesephiroth's Epic College Stories

more to come too lol
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Unread 01-25-2010, 02:01 AM
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Default Re: Masamunesephiroth's Epic College Stories

Hobo Kitty!Thats so cute Mr Matt.
Maybe if you should see hobo kitty again,you could adopt him.
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