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I can't post this on Tumblr, but I can post it on here.

Posted 06-09-2012 at 10:58 AM by LoopyPanda
Updated 03-05-2014 at 12:35 AM by LoopyPanda
Tags sad, thoughts

The stupid dog next door was barking all bloody night. Until 2. But I couldn't sleep. At 4:30 it started its barking again. So I didn't get a wink of sleep. Unless you count closing your eyes while still having an active mind as sleep.

I went on Tumblr. I checked into my dashboard to see a school kid I knew had her own tumblr and followed me. (She asked for my tumblr address and I gladly gave it to her.) She told me that her blog had some... personal stuff. I respected that. I was still too scared to post my actual emotions on my life there. All I do is reblog funny things. So I told her I didn't go on there often enough to check blogs and I only checked my dashboard, [which is what I do. :lol: ] and I wasn't on there to really zero in on a person's life in words, more to find reasons to laugh at the Rage comics. That was around April. Just half an hour ago or so, at 4:30, I looked at her blog for the first time.
Her posts were so... melancholy. She acts so different at school. Is that what they mean by 'don't judge a book by its cover'?

She blogged things she quoted herself that 'she wouldn't dare mention it to anyone at school.'

I read the whole thing, all five pages. There was a post on April 4th. I think it was about me. It was how she regretted telling someone she knew about her tumblr, and deleted her 'other' posts. She said that they might have already seen it.

I'm 100% sure that post was about me.

And never have I cried for another person I almost barely knew. I just want to tell her that I care. I didn't dare click the Follow button. She would feel like I zeroed in on her personal business. I don't want to give her more internal conflicts.

Nobody dare to make a snarky comment about how she could have been faking it. If you were me, you'd probably believe her.

And to think she lived a normal life. But she's locked all this away from everyone who looks the other way. I'm probably one of few of all of us who know what's going on.
I thought [i]my[/i] life was hard. I'm such a joke.
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